Day 11 - The Old Switcheroo

The decision was taken last night, that is I took the decision, to break my fast, I stated at the outset I wasn't going to be dogmatic about it or do anything that I felt my jeopardise my long term health and I was starting to feel downright unwell. Certain aspects I was happy to deal with, the dizzy spells for instance a result of lower BP and slower metabolism, simple, you get dizzy you sit down, wait a spell and then get up again but slowly and try not to overdo it.

Things like the muscle cramps and palpitations I was less happy about, they might have been psychosomatic but why take the risk, I can try another long term water fast whenever I like but if I make a complete hash of this one then maybe I can't!

So, yesterday evening some fruit (tangerines and blueberries), some various salad and later some starch in the form of potato and a little white fish was eater, ok I did have a small chunk of dark chocolate too, letting the flavour dissolve in all of it's bitter glory across my tongue!

As I broke the fast I decided that I will see out the remainder of the 40 days using ADF, Alternate Day Fasting, so I will continue to eat through Friday (day 12) and Saturday will be fast and so on which will give me a total fasting day count of 25 or 26 out of 40 days, obviously there won't be any of effects I was hoping to observe from a the prolonged fast and unless I eschew carbs on my eating days I am unlikely to see ketosis again but it will still be interesting to see what the effects are on my blood markers compared to the start.

Being honest I am very disappointed that I "failed" to make 40 days, with all I have read it doesn't seem such an impossible target, but you have to listen to your body and make reasoned and reasonable decisions on the basis of what you hear.

When I undertook the 21 day fast last year I was in the position of never really having fasted before, so maybe my nutrient reserves were higher, coming in to this fast I had been drawing on those reserves every week as part of my 5:2 regime and of course whatever toll the marathon and it's implicit training had taken. Even as I write that it sounds to me that I am finding/making excuses for my failure, but perhaps that is the nature of the beast within!

Weight post feed
186.6lb

Day 10 - Reflective

Given the amount of time in our daily lives that we probably spend thinking about food, what we just ate, what our next meal will be, any shopping we need to do... when one is fasting there is suddenly space in your head (and time of course) to stop and reflect a bit on things.

Yesterday I took some time to ponder my lifelong relationship with food and come to the conclusion that it is a pretty unhealthy one, although nowadays I actually eat quite well, it doesn't mean that my relationship with food is healthy. The problem is that food for me isn't just about take it or leave it as a fuel source, or even as a creative "art" if you like, although I can flirt with those aspects of it. Food for me has always been a source of emotional succour, I eat to make myself feel good, each guilty mouthful triggering endorphins, I eat to reward myself or find excuses to arrange a celebration meal, or a cake or whatever. I am also a secret eater, in that whilst I very much enjoy the social aspect of sitting around with friends or family and breaking bread, I am just as happy (or unhappy) shovelling a peanut butter and marmite sandwich into my mouth at 2am when the rest of the world is asleep.

I question of course, exactly what is a healthy relationship with food, is it healthy just to see food as a fuel? I need x calories for y hours = input, or should it be an “if I'm hungry I'll eat” situation?

Food of course is one of the few things that we have absolute control over in our lives, we choose whether or not we put something into our mouths and to a degree we also choose what, or at least everyone has the ability to make the distinction between junk and healthy. So is this fast just an exercise in control, am I doing it for the previously stated "health" reasons, for weight loss, or just because it's an area of my life I can control absolutely? Interesting thoughts, in truth it is a probably a combination of all 3.

I am definitely finding the fast harder this time around, the long fast I did last year I had more of a buzz and I actually felt good, both physically and mentally, if occasionally a little tired (exhausted) but sleep always seemed to rectify that, I would wake up re-invigorated and ready to go for another day.

This time I am a little stupefied, or not as sharp as I would like to be.. I am tired and achy, today to the point of some fairly high level muscle cramps, my fingers and toes curling inward, quads tightening and biceps trying to flex. My friend Google tells me this could be salt depletion, so I will make a visit to the Dr. tomorrow and see what they think.

No progress on returning to ketosis either, which is disheartening.

Weight 183lb
B/P 105/73
Pulse 89

Tomorrow is another day

Day 9 (Or which day is it?)

It all becomes a bit of a non eating blur!

Today was pretty physical at work, stock checking and sorting out lengths of steel, anything up to 150mm x 6mm in lengths of 6 metres, so gets suprisingly heavy. Happily the sun was shining so it was good to get to work outside and I took it all at a slow steady pace and didn'tm feel too many ill effects.

As far as the fast goes a bit of a hiccup, according to the keto-stix I'm not currently in ketosis, at least that is what they report, although they are well past their use by date, I'm certainly not trhough fat burning yet as their is plenty to go!

Also weight loss has stalled, which is less of a bother, as I was starting to panic that there would be nothing left of me by the target 40 days, a lot of other blogs I have read showed similar trends, masses of weight loss in the first week or two and then it slowed right down.

For now I will keep an eye on the ketosis situation, maybe buying some new stix and continue to monitor weight and bp, which was very low this morning, tomorrow is 10 days and 1/4 of the way in if I go all the way to 40 and I'm glad to report to all of those confessing their worries (nearly everyone I talk to) that I have not keeled over and died, collapsed or wasted away to nothing yet :)

Weight 183.2lb
BP 94/69
Pulse 85

Day 8

One thing that I meant to talk about at some point was the concept of toxin intake, obviously one of the big ideas behind fasting is that we are detoxing our bodies, stopping putting toxins in to allow all the crap that has accumulated time to ooze out! Fasting is stopping eating, I have also made a valiant effort to reduce the amount of stuff I put on my skin as most modern toiletries are petroleum based and it all simply gets absorbed into our system, I have also avoided any medication, riding out the headaches and I'm not taking any vitamins and minerals, as the delivery of these into my system would defeat the whole process of fasting, namely giving my system a rest from having to decide what goes where and just kick back and get on with some more mundane tasks like eating old scar tissue...



I am happy to report that my son Gideon has kindly offered to support me on my fast this week, it is much appreciated and helps me to stiffen my resolve to push on.



Today has been relatively hard, certain foods are starting to call to me more frequently now, the hunger has subsided again but there are cravings for sure. Naysayers and worry worts without fail tell me that cravings are my body's way of telling me what I am lacking, maybe so, but maybe it is just the final vestiges of habits trying to assert themselves.



Energy has been a little lacking today, I feel better having had a seriously hot bath (apparently helps toxin removal!) and will settle early tonight.



Weight 183.2lbs

BP 119/79



Pulse 72



So all normal

Day 7

I was of course hoping that the hunger would recede and I could go back to my happily ignorant of (if somewhat missing) food, without the gawing pangs and stomach rumbles as constant reminders of my state of eatlessness... no such luck, but such challenges were will power made for and it will make it all the sweeter when I get to my eventual target.



The run this morning was as previously mentioned easy, no more than a jog pace really, following the principles of chi running, which basically involve fast cadence, mid foot strike and minimising effort and exposure to injury, just 2-3 easy miles on an upliftingly beautiful morning, high tide, the sun sparkling off the sea and decent conversation. I was happy with how well it went and didn't suffer any ill effects, dizziness, lack of energy or anything else that might have been expected.



I followed the run up with a 2 hour walk along the south east coast, through bluebell wood for those that know it, the perfect time of year as they have just bloomed and the ground was a carpet of lilacs and purples.



The general obsession with food that dogs me somewhat has now turned into a bit of a game, so if I find myself fantasising about a certain food I will turn that into a reward that I will enjoy come the end of the fast, so far topping my list I have Sardines Poori from the Taste of India http://www.tasteofindiaci.com/dinein/ a dish that sets my taste buds alight at the best of times but that I imagine will explode them after they have been asleep fo over a month, yes my mouth is watering at the prospect!



Of course that is not the only thing on the list, I also have seafood risotto at the Fermain Beach Cafe, crispy aromatic duck and crispy beef with singapore noodles and a pad thai and if I can find somewhere that does a decent one a calzone pizza! OK enough about the food fantasies, mouth is watering a stomach rumbling again ;)



Back to work tomorrow so hopefully the distraction of a full day will get me back into a more easily managed routine to see me up to day Friday, which would be day 12.



Day 7 in itself is actually a pretty welcome achievement. As I mentioned in an earlier post my 21 day water fast last year was punctuated with 3 feed days on the Friday of each week, so I guess in reality it was only an 18 day fast, or more accurately 3 fasts of 6 days each with a day of 1000 food high in nutritional value, nuts, seeds, leafy greens etc.



So today sees me hit the milestone of the single longest fast I have undertaken, now we just have to see how long willpower can hold out, assuming that health doesn't suggest to me that I stop before.



Weight today, because I was out the door early for a run I didn't weigh myself until after I'd got back and had already consumed 1.5 litres of water, normal routine is to get up, evacuate and the weight, to get an accurate benchmark. Anyway for the record today read 184.8lbs which is the first time the scales have risen in a week, but I'm putting that down to the water, which would weigh approx 1.5kg or about 3.5lbs, I hope for a more sensible reading tomorrow!

Day 6

As anticipated day 6 was quite hard, being the first that I wasn't distracted by the routine of working for 8 hours of the day. It was made substanially more difficult when I had to give Evie (my daughter) a lift between her two jobs and she entered the car carrying a bag of chips (english version of fries to anyone trans-atlantic), the smell of chips always far outweighs the taste, fried potatoes doused in vinegar, it is almost designed to lure you into the shop and buy a bag, trappped in a car with it was purgatory. Almost immediately my stomach started to growl and the delicate mechanism that stops you feeling hungry when you are fasting was disrupted somehow, this set the tone for most of the day, hungry and craving, time for a test of will!

The other thing that threw me off balance by not sitting at my desk was water intake, I keep a pack of 500ml bottles there when I am at work so I have a ready supply of water to sip at at all times, today I was out and about a lot so had less ready access, although I tried to made sure that I drank enough I think I was probably a litre or two short of my desired target by days end.

As I type this up on the morning of day 7 (having been out late last night) I am feeling the effects of that as I have a pounding head and am trying to assuage that with a quick litre before I got out for my first fasting run, the theory is that this will be similar to running the last few miles of a marathon, when your glycogen levels have been depleted (what some people call the wall) I did manage a 45 minute walk yesterday with no real problems, but running at any pace will be a different matter.

Oh and the good news of the day was that I needed to go and buy a new pair of jeans, ok primarily because the old pair were tatty, but I needed to go down a waist size, and even those are a loose fit :)

Weight 184.2
BP 113/76
Pulse 65

Day 5

I know, I know, I should sell long term water fasting as a walk in the park to try and encourage everyone to give it a go, I would encourage everyone to give it a go of course, even if you just tried a one day or three day water fast there would be benefits, but it isn't always a walk in the park, just so you know.

Today has been fine really, no problems with hunger other than the previously reported psychological issue of just damn missing food, the occaisional stress moments at work that put me under a little more pressure than my "stay calm, stay calm" mindset could cope with, so I might have snapped at one or two people today, if I did sorry, but there is a warning note on my desk ;)

I was thinking today about the fat reducing properties of the fast today, note not weight loss, but fat loss, because that is what ketosis is, a mechanism to burn fat for fuel, lets call it mother natures wholesome liposuction.

Of course there are downsides to fasting, you need to display awesome willpower (especially when you work next door to a fish and chip shop) and you need to develop a coping mechanism for other people eating around you and what you do to fill the time when you would normally be eating (I've finally tidied my shed and started wood turning again), but the upsides are pretty good too, first as planned you shift a load of fat, second you get a self esteem boost from achieving this yourseslf and thirdly you get the myriad of other health benefits that come from fasting.

Whilst the results from lipo might be much quicker and involve less effort on your part, I think the results will be less benefical mentally, I mean how is your self esteem really going to benefit from having a surgeon stick a metal straw into you and suck your fat out, essentially you are admitting that you couldn't face the effort of shifting it yourself.... Add to that the risks of necrosis, infection etc and it just doesn't seem like the sensible option to me, that's not to say that I haven't run through that little fantasy of just rolling up to the dr and coming out 2 stone lighter!

So, how is my body holding up today, I'd say energy levels are about normal, arthritis in fingers and ankles is now non existant, which is great. I have been suffering ongoing aches in my hips and lower back for the last 48 hours, but these are low level background aches and stiffness, which I am putting down my body deciding that there is something that requires fixing there and that remidial work is taking a little toll,  it makes sense that my hips might require some repair after 400+ miles of training for Paris. The localised aches in week one also tally with my experiences last time, where I suffered some continued pain in the two areas where I had operations, which I assumed might be my body looking for non essential tissue to consume and was going to work on old scar tissue.. I know it sounds far fetched, but it makes some sense to me (and was mentioned in Dr Furhman's book) that when your body is fasting it will hunt for anything inside you that doesn't have a job to do and consume it, this includes both benign and malignant tumors apparently, which is one of the reasons that a number of cancer sufferers have reported good progress at shrinking tumors by fasting or calorie restriction.

I think that's enough waffling for a Friday night so I'll sign off with a couple of numbers for the day

Weight 186.2 from my start point of 90kg or 198lb

Blood pressure 89/72 which is considered low, but that's what I would expect at this stage of proceedings, I am now taking care about standing suddenly!

Pulse at 55bpm